Baby Update

Homeschooling continues, but all thoughts are on the impending arrival.

I am 2 weeks away from my due date, and I am locked, loaded, and ready to go. Just waiting for God to pull the trigger and get this baby rollin’. The doctor says the baby is fully in position, and that I may feel “some pressure.” MmmmHmmmm. I feel like I have a sumo wrestler sitting on me. Of course, sometimes that is almost true. Max thinks that climbing my stomach is one of the great joys of life. I think this baby is so terrified of Max that he is going to try hiding inside for as long as he can!

The doctor seems to think I will be right on time since I have been one day late, one day early, and right on time. Still, he asked if I was having contractions. I did have 4 hours of them last Sunday night, and spent 3 hours hovering at 7-8 minute intervals with them getting stronger. When I told him that, he said, “If the contractions stop, you know you aren’t in labor.”

I just stared at him. I wondered if I should ask for my co-pay back, but thought I shouldn’t push my luck. I may ask for pain meds if things get rough, and I’ll need him to be on my side.

As much as I appreciate that this kid needs this time in the womb, I don’t wait well. I met someone who is being induced 2 weeks early because she is so tired. If being tired is the criteria, I should have been induced a long time ago. I had to look it up on the internet. Naturally, I found several references for ways to induce labor naturally.

I like pineapple a lot, and I was willing to eat a few slices, but I thought that eating 7 raw pineapples in a row would be too much. I was afraid I get half way through the 6th one and get tired of pineapple, and then I would have consumed 1500 calories for nothing.

We went for a drive yesterday in search of bumpy roads, but couldn’t find many. I think I’ll write a letter to the editor to complain that there aren’t as many as there used to be, and they should leave a few around for emergencies like this.

I also found a website that showed various acupressure points that are supposed to either induce labor or make it less painful, depending on which you use. I tried pressing on my legs, 4 fingers’ width above my ankle bone, but nothing happened. I just figured that with all Max’s climbing, he has probably pushed the anti-induction pressure points so many times that the trigger has shut off.

Then there was the castor oil. Let’s just say I’m not that desperate. Yet. There were 2 suggestions: take it with orange juice or take it with eggs. I like eggs and I like OJ, so I don’t see how it would help me to mess them up. If I did ever take it, I’d want to take it with liver or Brussels sprouts so I wouldn’t have to worry about hating those foods for the rest of my life. Am I the only one who thinks of these things?

Since today was Sunday, I thought I might get a nap. If taking a nap on Sunday counts as keeping the Sabbath holy, then I’ll get an A for effort. Brian got a movie, we put Max down for a nap, and I settled in. They say that pregnancy makes a woman’s thermostat go up, and I am no exception to this rule. My internal body temp has reset from a constant of 97.1 all the way up to 97.2.

I piled on a down comforter and took another one and doubled it up to put on top. I used a lap blanket to cover up the one arm and my ear that were sticking out. After listening to Brian breathe for a quarter of an hour, I felt myself getting warm and falling asleep. I woke up in great pain, wondering if my bladder could possibly hold any more. This was that “some pressure” the doctor had warmed me about. It had been a half hour since I’d been in the bathroom, and I was afraid my bladder would burst, sending urine icicles spewing all over the room. I ran to the bathroom. There must have been 3 tablespoons’ worth in there. Whew!

The clock said I’d been asleep for 20 minutes. I settled in again and tried to get comfortable. I’m afraid to lie on my back for fear that I’ll get stuck and spend a half hour trying to roll over with my arms and legs flailing, like one of those beetles you see on the nature shows. I finally got into a position that wasn’t painful and relaxed. I felt myself drifting off. That is when Max woke up, screaming.

I think I’ll go eat some more pineapple.